A penny for my thoughts

Gather up your tears
Keep'em in your pocket
Save'em for the time when you're really gonna need it....

Alhamdulillah

After 5 years spent in UM.

All the hard work.

Not to forget all the fun times.

All the tears and of course, the laughters.

All of it.

With only one clear purpose at the end of the road.

:

:

:

Alhamdulillah.

I couldn't ask for a much better ending for this chapter of my life.

My tribute to the people who inspires me from the very beginning, Mama and Abah. For whom i can never express enough gratitude for all the sacrifices they've made, the lessons they've taught me and of course, the wonderful life they worked so hard to give me.


To dear friends who helped me through thick and thin of student life. What a journey we had!


To lecturers who inspires and motivates me to go the distance to achieve my goals, sometimes even in the weirdest, freakiest way. ( I never knew reverse psycology actually works =p)


And everyone, even random people on the road, those unplanned encounters who somehow touched my life and pulled me in the direction i'm going now. How fortunate of me to have met u!


The end of one chapter marks the beginning of a new one. What's in store for me next?

I am scrapping from zero

*Stealing some time while working*

I need to let this out. Because i couldn't possibly cry here. It would mean giving up.

But i feel like a complete idiot. I never knew that it is possible to not be able to make sense of something. I always find a way to figure out what i don't understand. Not in this case. Not when i have expectations to meet, and somehow i just have no idea how to get there. That, and not understanding what the heck is going on.

I've never been too fond of uncertainties. I would rather not do or even say something, until i am completely sure of where i stand in a situation. You can call me a coward, but i just don't see the point of it.

It's a common saying, "If you don't know anything, just freakin' shut up" (ok so not exactly a saying, but you get my point). What happens now is that, i have to go against it. How does that work? You can't possibly  teach the birds how to fly. That's what they do. And you don't exactly fly any better than the birds. You don't even freakin' fly. It doesn't help that you don't even have wings to try. It's just ridiculous.

What the heck am i trying to prove?!

Of a beginning and an ending

Forgive my laziness in updating this blog. I've just been having better things to do. 

Ok ok. No. 

*Tolong la jangan merajuk. Buruk rupa.*

I have been busy transitioning. 

*No. Not into a ninja turtle or anything out-of-the-world. Sheesh what gives you that idea?*

It's been quite an interesting period of my life, these past few weeks.I am actually turning into a working young lady. Oh god that sounded so makciks. Hahaha. But regardless, it was what has been occupying me the last couple of weeks. I have finally started my job. My first ever real job.

It's a new world for me. Some said i just threw away 4 years of technical study. But i don't really see it that way. It's more like turning a new leaf. I don't believe in confining myself to any specific genre. This is a total 180 degree turn for me. It's like entering a whole new universe altogether. 
I wonder what have i gotten myself into? =)

The unexpected actually keeps me on the edge of my seat. It's what makes me jump out of bed in the morning to go to work. So far, it did not fail to surprise me. Although in a rather puzzling kind of way. But i'm optimistic. They said i have a lot to learn. Hell yes, i do! But as long as they are willing to share their knowledge with me, i am more than willing to absorb it all in. 

This job requires me to work out station most of the time. It involves visiting clients office, conducting interviews and testing, follow-ups and such. This would mean less time spent at home with my family, and limited time to catch up with my girlfriends. Thank god for Twitter. Nowadays, i am such a Twitter junkie, it has become an important mode of communication with the girls. And weekends. Oh god weekends. I feel like sleeping all the way till noon (but i can't really do that, my folks would start bising by 10am duh). Well, i get their point. It's the only 2 days i have to go out and see the world. If i keep up with sleeping till noon (or god knows i could have slept till evening), i'd be a lonely old maid with no friends at 30. So i still drag myself up, shower and everything, say hello to the morning light, and start my day at 8am. I just love my weekends.

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On another note, my convocation ceremony is just around the corner. Prior to that, there's the robe collection day and rehearsal to attend. Since i'll be attached to an engagement in Batu Pahat for 3 weeks, there's a big chance i would miss the robe collection day *sigh*. And i might miss my friends graduation as well *sigh*. But i'm determined to attend the rehearsal at least. Wouldn't want to trip myself or exit through the wrong aisle on convocation day *yikes*

It's on the 7th of August, people. Feel free to drop by and say hello =D Pretty excited that i'm finally graduating!

This is me complaining

* Hormones-induced post. Consider yourself warned. *

This is so ridiculous. Some people kept asking me, "Hal, what are you still doing there?". I tried to defend my action and dear heavens, i tried to care. But now, even i don't see the point of it anymore. My being there is not even necessary than to add more burden those who actually care and to annoy those who just couldn't give a damn. And at the end of the day, i ended up annoying even myself for trying to please everyone too much. And for that, i selfishly ask myself, "What about me?"

I've said it before, and i'll say it again, even if i have to repeat myself a thousand times, if I am ever asked to choose between friends and family, I would choose my family without a second of hesitation. It is not in my nature to hurt anyone on purpose, but if i have to hurt my friends to make it right with my family, by all means hand me the dagger. Okay so that is to put it too strongly. And don't worry i don't go around stabbing people with knife. But just so you understand, i would go the distance for my family.

Please don't get me wrong, it doesn't mean that i don't love my friends. I do. In fact very much that sometimes it pains me to make decisions. But from my understanding, friends should be someone who respect your values in life, if not swear by the same virtue themselves. I have been very fortunate to have met so many people in my life who understands and shared the same family values as i do. These are the friends who always encourages me to stand by my virtue and based my action on it. However, there people who thinks that i am using it as an excuse to escape from responsibilities. Well, I  beg to differ.

Excuses are easy to make, but it left an uneasy feeling in your stomach after you throw it at someone else and the worst part is that the feeling lingers around for a very long time. A decision or solution is often hard to make, as it requires thorough considerations (and sometimes a lot of crying for those hard ones). However, the outcome of this one is a good feeling of satisfaction that you have made the right decision after weighing out all the options.

In my case, I genuinely feel that i have made the right decision. Don't believe me? Just ask those who were unfortunate enough to have seen and heard me at my worst during this time. (I kind of pitied them but hey, that's what friends are for right?=D) I also firmly believe that if you do the right thing, Allah will show that to everyone who ever doubted your decision. And believe me, that is all that matters. 

Can i stay here please?

Where?


Hehe. You see, i have this thing about holiday. I never want to go home. I fall in love with a place so easily. The people. The lifestyle. The food. The weather. In a way, i assimilate to a culture as easily as the world fell in love with Justin Bieber. (??)





This year, my annual family vacation was in Istanbul, Turkey. Yes, the land of cotton, olive oil, silk, and of course, hot Turks men. Haha. We are there for a week, a rather short time to fully explore the many wonders of Istanbul. But since it's really hard to put everyone's schedule together, any chance we had is a good time to go on holiday.


Last year, we didn't get to go on holiday together. I was alone in Paris visiting my aunt after completing my internship. My parents were too busy with work, but they managed to squeeze in a 5 days trip to Bandung, Indonesia for my second brother and youngest sister. Too bad for my first brother as he was in the middle of exams for his pre-university course in UM, he did not get to go anywhere at all. So, this year's holiday was some sort of a make-up holiday for him. Which is why he was the most excited. Or so he said.


So, we depart from KLIA on a Sunday night. From KL to Istanbul, it took almostt 10 gruesome hours to get to Atatürk International Airport. Let me tell you something. I was never a big fan of long-haul flights. Well maybe not if i'm flying the plane. Or if i fly business class instead maybe i would feel differently. But flying economy for the whole 10 hours was a complete torture for me. To make things worse, i'm not the type who sleeps well in a vehicle. Not even in cars. Unless i'm really really tired, which in this case, i was totally the opposite of tired. So as you can imagine, i hardly closed my eyes throughout the journey. I'm still in awe at how easily my brothers fell asleep. The plane was not even taxing for take off yet, and they are already dozing off probably somewhere in Lala Land. And as for me, i ended up tracing the route of the flight any chance i have. It went something like this:

1st hour                        : Oh the Andaman Sea.

2 hours later               : Oh we are in India.

3 hours later               : Can we stop by Dubai for a while?

Another 2 hours later : Oh oh i see Turkey up ahead! Mr. Pilot, please please speed up!

I would looovee to throw the "Are we there yet?" tantrum since this time i have my parents around, but i don't think my age could pull it of. It wouldn't be a pretty sight for everyone anyway. I wish i was 5 years old =(


However, thank-my-lucky-star for MAS in-flight entertainment system. They were my life saver. Well, they don't exactly have the most up-to-date movie selections but it did make the long hours much much more bearable. (2 hours of Channing Tatum, who's complaining?)

When we finally get there, it was a wet Monday morning in Istanbul. Our tour guide, Mr. Hidayat was already waiting at the airport along with our driver for the week. They took us to our hotel and the first thing i could think of was sleep. It was barely 8 am and the locals have not started their day yet. So i thought a quick nap would kill the time as i needed it very much. Well, i overestimated my self-control a little too much. I woke up at almost noon thinking i just lost half-a-day worth of sight seeing the city *sigh*.


The rest of my Turkish encounter will be told in pictures. It will tell most of the stories much better than my almost-all-the-time-sidetracked story telling.

After that very regretful sleep i had, we went out for lunch at a local restaurant in the Aksaray neighborhood called Emet Saray. The food was fantastic. I got my first taste of the famous Turkish meatballs and it was simply delicious. And there's something about the rice. Usually i am a heavy rice eater, but it only took a quarter of my usual portion to get me full. So very weird. 

That night, we took the tram to another neighborhood called Sirkeci to meet up with my aunt and uncle from Paris. We walked around the Gulhane neighborhood. In the rain. Haha. As the rain gets heavier, we stopped by for dinner at a restaurant called Home Made. Yeah. Not very original. And the food is not that good anyway. And it took waaay too long to get our food and it was crazy expensive as well! Such a waste. But one good thing though, they do have beautiful decorations (not that i could eat them though).

The next day, we started our tour around Istanbul. It was another rainy morning in the city but we get on with the plan anyway. Time is precious when all you have is 5 days. First stop: The Spice Market. Just look at the splash of colors!

Next is the Bosphorus Cruise. The cruise took us along the Bosphorus Strait which divides the Europe continent with Asia continent. Pretty amazing view. Oh and while cruising, guess who we passed by? Nah nobody really. Just the Chealse billionaire, Roman Abramovich relaxing on his yacht. *Oh oh he was recently divorced. Anyone interested?* =D

 

We get to drive along the Bosphorus Bridge which connects Asia and Europe. At each end of the bridge, you will be greeted by the sign welcoming you to Europe and Asia, whichever way you are heading.

Alhamdulillah, by the third day, the weather was wonderful for sightseeing. We visited the Hippodrome of Constantinople and the Sultanahmet Mosque (or more widely known as th Blue mosque) in the morning. The interior of the Blue Mosque was simply breathtaking! The walls are adorned with blue tiles (hence the nickname!) and dates back to the 1600. It is really quite sad to see that there have been attempts to steal the tiles on the walls. Hands off thieves! Go buy yourselves an imitation at the souvenir shops outside =D

In the afternoon, we visited the Topkapi Palace Museum followed by the Grand Bazaar. The Topkapi palace was one extraordinary complex. It was once the official residence of the Sultans during the Ottoman empire. It spans over a vast ground consisting of 4 courtyards altogether.  Now, it held some very important holy relics of the Muslim world such as the Sword of Rasulullah S.A.W and also of His Sahabats.  

On the fourth day, before we start the tour, Mama would like another round at the Grand Bazaar. This time, we spent almost 4 hours there shopping for ceramics and tiles for our house. It was fun for Mama and I. Not so much for the boys though =p Oh oh and this is when i got myself a new Turks boyfriend! Mama wasn't too happy about this hehe. Some of the beautiful things we bought at the Grand Bazaar:

After lunch, we were taken to a mosque at the outskirt of Istanbul where the tomb of a famous Sahabat, Ayub Al-Ansari was located. He was sent by Rasulullah S.A.W to conquer Istanbul (then known as Constantinople). He requested that when he died he was to be buried in Istanbul thus the Sultan at the moment granted his request by building him a special tomb at the mosque. While at the mosque, we saw boys dressed up as prince walking around. We later learned that it is a local ritual that before a boy undergoes circumcision, he has to visit a mosque to pray. Well, it sure seems like an unusual ritual to us, so we just had to take picture with the cute looking boy! Oh he'll grow up to be one handsome young man haha!


Oh and before we call it a day, the tour guide took us to take picture at some part of the fortification wall called Theodosian Wall from the 4th century. It was indeed a good place to cam-whore!

And on the final day, we went to visit the terminal station for the Orient Express. Back when it was still running, the Orient Express travels from Paris to Istanbul in what was considered as luxury travel. Now, the station held a museum in remembrance of the glorious days of Orient Express. Such a nostalgic place, even if you have never board the train. 


After that, we meet up with my aunt and uncle for some last minute shopping for small souvenirs to take home. Since it was Friday, the men had to go for Jumaat prayer at noon. Lucky them, they get the chance to perform Jumaat prayers at the Blue Mosque. A once in a lifetime experience maybe for them. While they were at it, the rest of us went for a walk at the Gulhane Park located just outside the wall of Topkapi Palace. 

On Saturday, we left for the airport at 11.30 am for a flight back to KL at 2.30 pm. 
Oh before that, let me introduce our driver on the left picture, the 2nd guy from the right. Until the end, we didn't find out his name (-_-") It doesn't help that he doesn't speak a single word of English. But he is a very nice man, always smiling though he understands nothing. Uh oh and he drives like  a mad man! My personal mentor! Haha.
And not to forget, our tour guide, Mr. Hidayat on the right picture, the one in the red shirt. He is very fond of my name, forever quiz-ing me on the information that he just told us. Sometimes he made me nervous, as if i'm taking exam or something. Chill out dude! I'm here on holiday!


All in all, it was a holiday with fun-filled adventure (ok sounding like some kids show commercial) and also a new and very different culture altogether from Malaysia. And the people are very friendly especially the men. Ok i don't mean to sound menggatal or sexist or anything. But i don't see that many women on the street. And the few that i met are either very ignorant or very kedekut senyuman. The men however, are very friendly and helpful. Bagai langit dengan bumi. Haha. Ladies, take it from the men, it wouldn't hurt to smile more =D


OOKAAY. I think this is a long enough post. I'll save you the horror of reading anymore of my never-ending-stories for later. Now i better stop and get some sleep. See you at my next post! =)

See you in August!

After two weeks of sleepless nights, the agony finally comes to an end well, a few days ago. Okay so i am a bit slow on updating. You would forgive me if you heard what i've been doing the past couple of days =D 

Back to the story, my results for the final semester is finally out. I am not actually following the right channel to get my results (who asked them to block the accounts of final year student). They posted our grades for each subjects on the board at the department (yes, for the whole world to see -_-"). Alhamdulillah i passed everything, not exactly with flying colors, but it basically revolves around A and B therefore i am more than grateful. But those results alone are not enough to put my mind at ease. The most important thing is to obtain my CGPA, and then i can decide to cry my eyes out or scream with joy. So, a bunch of us mechanical people sweet-talked the nice lady at the office to give us our final grades. Safe to say, i will see those of you who are graduating from UM at the legendary Dewan Tunku Canselor this August!

You see, the job offer that i accepted and will be starting in July gives a condition to fulfill that is i need to maintain a CGPA above 3.0 or they have the right to terminate me, err before i even started. As in, they could revoke the offer at anytime. So it's a matter of life and death for me to get a good result to secure my job at the company. Again, Syukur Alhamdulillah, berkat from parents' constant prayers for their daughter, on the 5th of July, i will start my new job as business analyst for a consulting firm in Damansara. I have been truly blessed so far, i should have no reason to complain anymore (but you see i do have the XX chromosome, so complaining is really in my nature =p)


Ok so for the time being, my days are filled with class, class and more class.


Yeah. I know. What the heck am doing still going to classes?


Well, as i mentioned before, i am currently attending an AutoDesk Professional Certification Program in UM for a month which started a week after i finished my exams.Yeah yeah not much holiday for me =( It's a 2 part certification program consisting of 2 weeks of AutoCAD certification and another 2 weeks of Inventor certification. Last week i completed my AutoCAD program and manage to obtain my certificate for AutoCAD Professional. This week, the class for Inventor has started for another for the exam being on the 7th of June. But i won't be taking exam on that date because by then, i would probably be shopping at the Grand Bazaar in Istanbul! =D


So you think after a 9-5 class daily, i am done with classes and books and studying whatsoever. No! Of course i can squeeze in more studying after the long day. Right. Ok. Those who know me would think there's something totally wrong with that statement (-_-") Twice a week, my brother and i will attend a mandarin class at night thanks to our dear Abah. Ok i won't deny the importance of mastering this particular language. You see, my parents always have my best interest at heart. Since my work would require me to interact with people from all kinds of background, it would be to my advantage to be able to communicate in language other than my mother tongue and English. Since the business world especially in Malaysia is dominated by the Chinese people, Mandarin is a good choice of third language for me to learn. (Wait or should i say fourth, after French last semester?)


Anyhow, i still can't help but feel a bit overwhelmed about everything sometimes with this being my last holiday and yet i am still attending classes and exams even more hectic than my student life. But i take comfort in thinking of the holiday plans that is to come. Despite it all, i am still grateful that i have things to look forward to when i wake up every morning. Imagine waking up and * kreek kreek kreek* you have no idea what you'll do that day. Man, i will pick hectic anytime. 


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On a totally different note, last weekend was the first time i went out with my course mates after our exams ended. We decided the spend a night camping on the beach of Blue Lagoon, Port Dickson.

It's not exactly the most amazing beach i've ever been to in Malaysia, but it was a fun trip overall. The food was great, well partly because i help to prepare them =p We had BBQ and games at night. Who knew eating in the dark could be a lot of fun hehehe. But most importantly, i discover something that i have been missing out lately. I finally realize that i need to learn to let go. It is time to let him go. I finally understood the saying that if you love someone, you should let them be happy even if it means you have to be the one getting hurt. Allah knows best what is in store for me in the future. So, YOU! Be happy okay! Because i love you. And i'm letting you go =) 

Last Few Days

Yes i finally sat for my last paper  in University of Malaya to complete the necessary 120 credit hours for my Bachelors Degree in Mechanical Engineering last Wednesday, 5th May 2010. Hopefully, all went well and i will be able to graduate this August with all my friends. InsyaALLAH...

Right after my last paper, i was tired to my bones from nights and nights of last minute study with average sleeping hours of one to none at all.  Ok kids, take it from an expert: last minute study will suck the life out of you. It will drain your blood to the very last drop until you are no better than a walking zombie. I should have learnt this after 4 years of being in university but i guess my skull is way too thick for it to get through to my brain (-_-")

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On another note, this year, my activity after the last paper was a bit different from the 7 semesters before where i used to spend the night after the exam with my course mates. We usually went out and about town,  till the wee hours of the morning going anywhere our feet took us (or should i say, our cars took us?) as long as we did not have to go back to our houses. But i guess those are the days of the young bloods. 

This year, i decided to spend my last few hours as a student with my girlfriends. The girls who have been my most loyal confidant from the very first day i set foot in UM. "Why?", you may ask. Well, these are the girls who stick by me through the thick and thins of student life. Constantly lending me shoulders to cry on when i feel like the world shuts down on me and shared every possible laughters together. Since most of us would start working as early as June and July, and with Sheilalala going back to JB for her internship, it would be hard for us to get together again. So i figured, it was only right to end my journey in UM with the people i love most. The photos will tell the story of our final girls day out as university students. Enjoy!


First stop: Penang Village at Great Eastern Mall Ampang for a Dim Sum treat.

Our driver of the day, Lil' Miss Iliyanto.

Our second driver, all the way from Seremban, Miss Syerry Merry.

Our first destination, Penang Village in Great Eastern Mall.

Such a beautiful place to eat! Black and white with wide window panel, we had a hard time picking a seat with the best view. At last, we settled for this one.

The best part: the food! We were all understandably starving as it was way past 3 o'clock when we get our food. I  swear Fariza wouldn't as much as lift her head from the plate even if a hot guy pass by =p

The happy campers! 

Next stop: Parking run-around! (Ok no really it was Times Square =p)

Ok so Syerry Merry had to leave early for some family errands and Ayyun has to say goodbye to meet with her Mr. Boyfriend. Thus, we said goodbye to Syerry Merry at the car park of GE Mall and proceed to send Ayyun to KL Sentral. As for the rest of us, we are not ready to call it a day yet. So we decided to go to Times Square. However, with the traffic being in peak hours we thought it would be better to park somewhere and take the Monorail instead. After going rounds and rounds looking for a place to park, we could not come up with the most suitable place. Alas, we settled for the obvious. Let's just drive ourself to Times Square!

Shielalala needed to do some shopping for a wedding she will be attending soon. So we scout around the many floors of Times Square in search of a white lace baju-kurung-like top and we finally found the perfect one at the best bargain: RM25! Oh unfortunately we forgot to take a picture of the top :( But it was one perfect steal! 

Well, after working hard to find the perfect top, we feel that we need to reward ourselves with a little treat. So we stop by at espreSOUP for a delicious mushroom soup served in a bread. While the girls are enjoying their mushroom soup, i was busy indulging on some chocolate gelato from Gelatomio.

Empangan pecah~

The salad that comes with the soup. The girls attacked it before it could be photographed. There's really nothing i can do about that (-_-")

So, by now you would think that we are done eating for the day? Well...... OF COURSE NOT! We still need coffee. Hehehe.... Right after we walked out of espreSOUP, we stopped by here:

Hehehehe... we should be well ashamed of our eating habit but we just couldn't help ourselves! =D

  

Let's call this snack time okay? =D

We almost turned Krispy Kreme into our home!

The day is filled with jokes and endless laughter. We had fun reminiscing about our crazy past and making plans for the future. Honestly, all this would be hard in the future with everyone starting to build a life of their own and obligations starts to kick in. However, we will try our best to keep our friendship just as it is now. We will make a point of seeing each other at least once a month just to keep in touch and keep everybody's sanity in check with all the crazy-ness of working life. And most importantly, we would always be to each other what we are today: the best of friends.

Daddy's Girl

I never realize how much of a daddy's girl i am, getting everything (well, almost everything) my way. If i have to list down everything  that i got away with my dad, i wouldn't finish writing until tomorrow or heck maybe even next week. Still, here goes some (and that probably means 0.1% of the total of it).

1. He paid for the cost of replacing the front mirror, the engine hood (or whatever it is called), and the front light and well everything that has to be replaced after i hit a pick-up truck. That, and i never even got a single scolding.
2. I lost a white gold ring that cost quite a $$$$$ a few days after he gave it for my birthday. (In my defense it was at a surau during buka puasa and it probably went for sedekah =D)
3. The new phone he got me got soaked in the river during my visit to Ulu Yam with some friends. The phone was a total lost. And this happen exactly one month after i got it, again as a birthday present.*Yeah i have quite a bad luck when it comes to birthday presents.*
4. I showed up at his office unannounced to print a 100 page report because 1) i have no time to go home and print to meet the dateline and 2) it was ridiculously expensive to print at the shop in college. Talk about family exploitation. He actually got one of his staff to do it for me (-.-") 

So that was a few of the things that he lets me get away with. That, times 5872 and you get the whole list. These kinds of things happen to me all the time i lost count of it *tepuk dahi*. However, he wont't compromise when it comes unethical behavior  or study/future related. He is, after all, a dad who wants his kids to be well educated and well behaved persons. So far, i could say proudly that i have never really failed him in that department *cheers* and i don't intend to do so in the future either. The least i could do is by giving him a daughter that he could be proud of. 

And i end this post with something that happened earlier this morning before he left for work.

Me: Abah, can i put one gate remote in my car? I always forgot to bring my keys.

Abah: Yeah sure. Take the old one in the drawer.

Me: Uuuummm *not very satisfied* the old is very ugly la, black and everything. I want the new want. *yeah i know a bit mengada*

Abah: Hmm ok la you can take the new one.

See, he always lets me have my way. =D

Alamak =D

I used to assume no one is reading my blog. It turns out there are people in my life who reads it. LOL. And there are people who fell into the wrong assumption after reading what i wrote.

OK here goes a short DISCLAIMER. 

Everything that i wrote are indeed related to the people in my life. It's basically a place for me to speak my mind and vent out my frustration on certain issues governing my life and the people around me. However, it would be pretty uncool if i started dropping names wherever unnecessary (i.e. menjatuhkan maruah orang lain). So please do not be too quick to assume it was about you because honestly, i have so many people in my life that there might be a good chance that i.m not referring to you at all. LOL. Just read it with an open mindt if you are interested in understanding my outlook in life. I'm an ordinary girl going through the all the things you are going through (err if you are a girl lah). It would be really nice if some of you could relate to how i feel.